🧸 Walking on eggshells, or blaming themselves more lately?
Saying "it's all because of me" — or going unusually quiet around one particular adult or person?
Children show their hearts through faces, bodies, and changed behavior long before words. This tool slowly translates those signals into grown-up language.
This tool doesn't blame the child or grade anyone's parenting. It organizes who was with the child, and what words and behavior you observed — from the child and from the people around them.
Don't read the questions to your child or have them answer. Answer first, based on scenes you've seen yourself. If your child starts talking, don't steer them toward answers — take the words they choose exactly as given.
About 5 min · 20 questions for the selected relationship
See the references
attachment research, opens in a new window, theory-of-mind development in early childhood, opens in a new window, reactions that can follow childhood trauma, opens in a new window. The 20 questions and four observation areas were built specifically for this tool. The cited materials have not validated them, and early-childhood research can't be applied unchanged to children of every age. This result alone can't judge a child's psychological state or the cause of any relationship's trouble.
Your answers are never saved or sent to a server. Refreshing starts over from the beginning.