Separating what they said and did from what you'll do
✨ Stop persuading — set today's task in one sentence
You don't have to keep explaining until your 'no' is accepted. Their reaction, like the weather, isn't yours to set. What you answer, and when you stop — that is.
Your own broken promises and wrongs get checked separately. Their judgments and reactions don't become your responsibility.
What you can't decide
Their answers, moods, choices — whether they change
What you can decide
What and when to answer, when to stop, who to ask for help
Sorting your shareSeparate their reaction from what you'll do.
Choosing one actionPick what's needed now: recording, distance, or help.
One-sentence summarySet today's standard and one small action.
No real name needed. What you type is used only on this screen.
📚 View the sources this draws on
This tool doesn't look for ways to change the other person. It separates what they did from what you'll do today. It draws on research about the sense of choice, feasibility, and social support. It replaces neither testing nor treatment.